The Age of Stress as a Precedent

The cover story of Time Magazine on June 6th, 1983 declared America “In the Age of Stress”. It depicted us as a society consumed by demands for our resources and threats to our well-being.
Since that time in 1983 when the official diagnosis of Post Traumatic Stress Disorder was first categorized by the Board of Medicine and Psychology there has been little effort made to define the parameters of stress, thus leaving us (the lay-person) to define ANYTHING with an overwhelming effect…. as stress.
Because stress is a natural form of physical reaction to our environment, I feel it vital to understand the nervous system, its fundamental (base) response, and its contradictions.
The word “stress” has been so overly used and emphasized, as to describe everything from marital discord to juvenile delinquency, that I find it prudent to discuss the implications of typical (physical) stress vs. the “stress scapegoat”.

Stress has now become a way to blame our fears and psychological malaise on every unpropitious occurrence. These situations could easily be handled if we understood our personal reactions and childhood traumas, and knew the difference between a natural Fight/Flight response or an overly stimulated psyche.

Emotional Investment

At our core we are all emotional beings. Virtually every decision, reaction and behavior comes, on some level, from an emotional need or desire. While we love to see ourselves as essentially logical, rational, pragmatic creatures, the truth is, often we’re not. For the most part, we are overwhelmingly emotional beings.

Let’s pretend for a moment that you have a finite amount of emotional currency to spend each week (just like the wages you earn from work) and that you need to invest those dollars wisely to ensure the best possible return. Of course, we could argue back and forth about the notion of having a finite amount of emotional dollars to spend each day or week, but I think we can safely say that our emotional bank account is not some bottomless pit. It can run out from time to time. And for many people it does – sometimes for months or years at a time. I think we all know people who have invested their emotional dollars poorly and have suffered the consequences of living on or below the emotional poverty line.

What happens with most emotional investments is this little issue called “life”. We make the investment, expect a return, and then watch as life changes the rules. A double blow if the investment fails to return. What we need to explore is balance, common sense, and a little less attachment (all your eggs in one basket). By simply remembering you are not a bottomless pit of energy, you will begin to question what (or who) you invest your emotions in and hopefully avoid the huge disappointments that happen when your expectations are dashed

Got yours?

The belief that perfection can be achieved affects the lives of countless numbers of people. Many people are obsessed with achieving perfection to the point that it affects their physical and psychological well being. These individuals are commonly referred to as “perfectionists.” They seek the perfect mate, the perfect job, the perfect body, and they are often unhappy in their quest.

Even the most mundane task can become an ordeal since the task must be performed to an exacting standard. These people experience disappointment and dissatisfaction and are often unable to enjoy the simple pleasures of life. They believe that perfection is attainable; they experience falling short of the goal as failure. These individuals spend an inordinate amount of time trying to make certain that they will avoid making mistakes.

Perfection is meant to be an abstract ideal toward which we strive in an attempt to gain proficiency and to excel. It is a concept designed to spur us on to greater heights. The meaning of the word perfection is illustrated by the phrase “striving toward perfection.” Few people who adopt seeking perfection as a value (as opposed to achieving perfection) expect to achieve it. Seeking perfection merely connotes that process of moving closer to an abstract ideal.

The British have a saying that encourages people to show their skills while mocking the universal “fear of failure”:  Do your worst.

If you can’t tolerate your worst, at least once in a while…… how true to yourself can you be?