Cognitive Dissonance

I know it’s been a while since I’ve posted. Been ultra busy getting another site ready. (I’ll post it up here when it launches).

In the mean-time… this is pretty interesting.

“In the second of a series of four episodes, Turbowolf interview Graham Hancock at The Roman Baths in Bath. Graham Hancock is one of the foremost authorities on Ancient Mysteries, having written numerous bestselling non-fiction books on the subject such as ‘Fingerprints Of The Gods’, ‘The Sign & The Seal’, ‘Heavens Mirror’ and ‘Supernatural’ and, recently, the fantasy adventure novel Entangled. 

Turbowolf released their self-titled debut album in November 2011, a blend of dirty rocknroll, punked-up riffs & psychedelic noise. The band are about to embark on a European tour starting 23/2 in London. Their shared fascination with the esoteric & the mysterious lead to this meeting of minds. 

In this episode Graham & the band discuss the mystery of the possible survival of death by human consciousness, the ancient Egyptian quest for the immortality of the soul, the encoding of advanced scientific information in ancient myths, some of the evidence from ancient Egypt and the Andes for the existence of a lost civilisation, and the danger, unless we change our ways, that our own civilisation could become the next Atlantis.”

 In the second of a series of four episodes, Turbowolf interview Graham Hancock at The Roman Baths in Bath. Graham Hancock is one of the foremost authorities on Ancient Mysteries, having written numerous bestselling non-fiction books on the subject such as ‘Fingerprints Of The Gods’, ‘The Sign & The Seal’, ‘Heavens Mirror’ and ‘Supernatural’ and, recently, the fantasy adventure novel Entangled.

… aaand we’re off!!.. to a rousing start here at the beginning of 2012. Congress is being “brought out of the closet” (finally) by the Pres. and actually getting coverage by mainstream media. (!?!)

More awareness than ever before in our human history – of those things “non-physical” i.e. time contraction, high/low energy swings, strong feelings, odd sensations, clarity of other’s needs, strange dreams, weird kind of dizziness, strange sounds everywhere – The thing I referred to in an earlier post as the “alchemical meat grinder”. I just put a title to what I’ve been reading from other peoples comments and hearing about from clients, and feelings within myself.

Which brings me to the title of this piece… “DO NO HARM”

Just a little background on the statement… I began with this thought in my heart sometime last summer after an experience I refer to as “the event” (not the TV show, although that was very interesting)… but something way personal for me – a full on paradigm shifter. 

As I moved into this year - just within a short 4 weeks, that statement continues ticker-taping across my mind more and more. I have said before how it goes…. “Once you stake a claim on a belief or a truth, the testing begins”. I understand why the testing must happen, and I know it will continue until my reactions fall in alignment with the truth – but WOW this is hard.

The constant awareness of opposites was the first to show up. The “us and them” factor followed and is closely tied to “who would I be if I had nothing to fight?” I began to realize how absurd my internal voices were and how they are constantly trying to solve the never ending non-solvable “who-dun-it” mystery, by subtly blaming myself and others for my misery and mistakes. Exhausting I tell you! – and not only that, but I think it is exactly WHY I feel exhausted most of the time. (searching for the “thing” that’s causing my discomfort)

I’m being gut level honest here, I have not a clue how to shut off the crazy banter in my head, but the gentle ticker-tape reminder (Do No Harm) along with a strong “I’m sorry” (Ho’oponopono) is helping little by little. 

I am spending more time alone, wanting more time with the feeling of not harming. It takes a concerted amount of focus to stay still in the mind, not an easy task at all, and to add a little personal info – it is NOT meditation. This is what I’ve got to throw at it (the mind-muddle), it’s my little piece of participation, activism, and responsibility. I take it VERY seriously, as the cosmic “testing” will attest. 

I figure, with anything we do in accordance with a higher law or understanding, comes the contrast – just as stark. It’s how we do it down here. I expect it. I often fail the test … but I won’t stop trying.

 Take the time … it’s worth it, and inspiring.

I can honestly say, I have worked my ass off from early childhood on – attempting to rid myself of painful memories, mental and emotional assaults, and devastating experiences. I have made it my mission to open my heart to (real love – eternal, mystic love) the thing I was never taught or witnessed, as a child – using every modality available – psychoanalyzing, prayers, ceremonies, mantras, blessings, initiations, drugs, gurus, teachers, classes, sounds, workshops, and affirmations – ALL with no lasting results… Nothing has ever worked to rid me of the indwelling nasty houseguests in my mind, so…. I laid down in my bed one night and just gave up – once and for all.

 (I guess things only happen when the real “fuck-it” comes.)

 I couldn’t do it anymore. I literally had succumbed to: “this is how it’s going to be, so learn how to live the rest of your life just getting thru the day”…. and then – for the umpteenth time, I wept.

Thru the night, I would wake up, have that thought, “this is just how it’s going to be”, cry uncontrollably, and fall back to sleep.

This didn’t just go on for one night; this went on for days and nights. Then more days, and more nights …

Then something different happened-

 I awoke the next morning in the usual manner, “fuck-it”– “I have struggled with this pain all my life… I’m exhausted from carrying around these feelings, while pretending I’ve got my shit together in front of everyone else”….

I took a deep breath, a sigh actually; and as I laid there swimming in my “head-soup” and snot…  something weird happened (more like a feeling really) it made its way thru the mud of my mind and into the conversation. I heard it loud and clear.

“I love you, I am sorry, please forgive me, thank you”

EXCUSE ME? (as though I was speaking to someone else in the room)

“I love you, I am sorry, please forgive me, thank you”

I sniffed back the drool, adjusted my body in the bed and listened again… no words this time, but a flash of memory – my foster mother throwing a glass of whisky at me, it cracking against my head (I was 4 years old) … and then those words – almost like a whisper – “I love you, I am sorry, please forgive me, thank you”

I think I must have been in some kind of shock or something. How in the hell do those two things go together in a thought? Seriously…WTF???

Then another horrible image (private)… then the words again… “I love you, I am sorry, please forgive me, thank you”

“Okay”, I said out loud … “what the hell is this?” – more mind-mud – “you’re just makin’ that shit up… you’ve heard too many spiritual woo-woo statements, and that one just stuck….” Hang on a second; I need to hear that again… I need to UNDERSTAND this!

Silence.

Nothing… so I got up, made myself a strong cup of coffee and decided to just type the words into my computer. (side note: I often use my computer like a tarot deck when something strange pops into my head – I do a search on it… it’s weird… I know… it’s just my thing. But you would be shocked at what we “pick up” on the airwaves). Anyway….

“I love you, I am sorry, please forgive me, thank you”… BLAM… the words Ho’oponopono show up. Wait a minute; I’ve seen this before. This has got to be in the list (up there) of things “tried and failed”. I know I’ve done this before… haven’t I?

The first web site I hit was > http://www.idreamcatcher.com/hooponopono/

I read it, and I suggest before you continue on with what I have to say here… you read it too. And take note of the guy who brought it into the “market”. I have a little something for “Joey” at the end of this article.

My mind starts spinning fast. I start to think, holy shit… what if this were the only thing left to do? THE ONLY WORK WE NEED TO DO, to help us all get thru this massive transition…. This 2012 crash and burn alchemical meat grinder! (more on that later)

What if we could actually DO THIS and it would work? At the very least, maybe it would help us get in touch with a deeper more meaningful way to deal with all the wars and personal pain, and planetary changes?

What the hell… It couldn’t hurt!

So I started. And something wonderful happened to me. I began to feel lighter, less heavy, and less sick inside. I tried it on every negative thought… they abated. I tried it with my water… it tasted better… I tried it with my clients and friends – they lightened up! On and on… now I’m doing it all the time. Inside my head, quietly and privately… taking responsibility… by just saying the words.

“I love you, I am sorry, please forgive me, thank you”

My personal results have been astounding so far. I am actually starting to feel something changing inside. I can’t explain it (nor do I really want to) but it’s better than crying myself to sleep at night in misery. A lot better!

I do want to state here, that this is a work in progress. I’m not sure I’ll ever be a “happy-happy-joy-joy skippy girl”, but if I can get that 51 % positive thing everybody is talking about… I’ll take it!

So I had my friend Tom put a little “widget” on this site to keep pumping the vibration out there and onto the net. I also decided to make this my “little mission”.

I’m going to “pay it forward” and use it with everything – personal and public. I claimed it as my medicine, and whether it “gives” me something or not, I’m going to do it anyway. No expectations.

If I’ve learned anything from this life – I know this… once you stake a claim on some truth or belief, or make a resolve, you can bet your ass you are gonna be tested on it! How else will you know unless you’re given a way to try it out?

So let me be the first to tell you, I HAVE BEEN TESTED… and after another failure (as it would seem)… I went back to the statement – “I love you, I am sorry, please forgive me, thank you”, again a change inside me, and again another test.

And so it is.

The only decent video I could find explaining the story behind “Ho’oponopono” is the link just below. The problem I have with it (there’s always something – right?) is that this guy (Joe Vitale) has used it – capitalized on it to make money – and gotten himself some pretty “eye candy” from the looks of the photos on his web site… But what the hell right? … everyone deserves to make money – so HEY Joe –

“I love you, I am sorry, please forgive me, thank you”

http://yogaofalignment.com/2009/05/20/hooponopono-i-love-you-im-sorry-please-forgive-me-thank-you/

I found a few other links with some good info on this old wisdom; it’s been around for a while so it looks like people have their own way with it. I’m good with that – whatever works right?

http://www.thereisaway.org/Ho’oponopono_cleaning_meditation.htm

The basic meaning of the word Ho‘oponopono – given by the Hawaiian culture, (and loosely translated) – means “to set things right”. The basic concept behind practicing Ho‘oponopono requires you to first realize the immutable fact that your entire existence comes from within, not from anything, anyone, or anywhere – outside of yourself.

Read more here – http://tribes.tribe.net/hooponopono/thread/96903cc1-435b-47f5-8b08-8e70ff6228b5

What does one do with a weary heart, but try to lighten it? …. yet only in the rarest of times do we share the deep and Holy. 

From my world to yours, much love - 

Oshi

I am a splintered bird of the tribes long lost – a sparrow in the strong winds

I dwell in a deep cave where many lights flicker – so many not one can be seen

Within this cave, the hold of crowded light – I sing my song to the tree people

I call to those spirits perfect and whole- for they know the true names of the elders 

I sing only to them, the orphans lament – for the two legged no longer have ears

They will pass this aria to my brothers and sisters – and the others who cry alone 

Great Mother, grant me the wisdom of your experience to heal the purple and red,

for they are the wounds left over by every man – the malaise of the cold and dark 

Carelessly unattended, we are lost and without strength – our minds are weary from wander 

Help us return from our solitary distance, for we long to come home and be welcome

I offer to you, all that I have – my song from the winds in the trees

Blessed Mother call to me this one last time, and I will emerge from the darkness within

All orphans hear me, as we make this last push – use every bit of your strength 

Let us bid farewell to the old and the stale – happy to never again mourn

We will rise on the winds of the tribes united – together, one heart – one mind

For we are the harmony in the caves of light – and our brilliance will not be confined 

Beloved Shaman, I asked, “how might I awaken from this endless dream? For it seems, by loving this world, it has broken my heart, and when I stopped loving this world, my heart became broken. I have forgotten my way and I am truly lost in this dream of being human.”

Shaman answers, “Deep inside [of you] is a place where no sane person would dare go. You must lose your mind to find your sanity, and with each glimpse of the deep inside, each taste you get of the Great Nothingness, you will find what is real. The madness you feel has come only from your postponement, and even that has brought you great wisdom. So I will walk with you there, but just to the edge, and I will call the Great Beasts to guide you, but once we arrive, the leap must be yours, for only you know the way out of the dream.”